Pro Tip: How to Create a Self Care Routine in 6 Steps

What is Self Care and Why is it Important?

Self care is a really popular concept right now which is great! However, its popularity has also brought on misconceptions and misinterpretations of what it actually is. A good way to understand self care is to recognize what it’s not. 

While self care is heavily talked about now, a lot of mainstream interpretations of self care actually fall under self soothing. It’s still a very important set of tools, but it has a distinct purpose from self care. Actions that fall under self soothing are the things you do to get through a distressing moment and make you feel better, but are outside your normal routine. Self care is the preventative and restorative measures you put in place to maintain and heal your mind, body and soul. 

This distinction is important to understand. While self soothing behaviors feel nice and freeing, constant indulgence can lead to unhealthy coping mechanisms. In contrast, self care can sometimes be difficult to carry out, but has significant long term benefits. It helps you build resilience and the ability to get through life more authentically.

1. Set realistic expectations

Conversations around self care can hold some discomfort for folks. Not everyone has the ability or immediate access to resources that would be necessary to achieve certain goals. While yes, there are always free resources and workarounds, it’s important to hold space for very valid emotions that come with not having certain privileges or having to endure particular life circumstances. This is another reason I really want to emphasize the difference between self care and self soothing. Self care is all about the control you have in learning who you are and how to take care of yourself. I could list a hundred different activities and suggestions for what I consider self care to be, but you should set the tone for your routine. Self care can be achieved a countless amount of ways and can only be defined by you, your needs, and your experiences.

2. Know Your Growth Areas

When determining how to create self care routine, there are four major areas you can address:

Each of these areas can have their own set of needs and points of growth. While it can be helpful to hone in on one particular area at a time, what you end up working on in one area may show up or highlight something from another.

3. Reflect and Identify

Take some time to really sit and think about the answers to these questions for each area.

• What does it mean to be healthy in this area?

• How can you build up your resilience in this area?

• What have you avoided dealing with in this area?

• Do you know the limits, boundaries, and triggers that would affect your overall wellness in this area?

The beauty of self care is that while you may have answers to some of these questions, they can change based on who you are in that moment. If you don’t have answers, then trying out different things to get the answers to these questions is what can make up your self care routine.

4. Break it Down

Your self care routine needs to be a part of your overall routine. Oftentimes, we push off the things we need to do for ourselves for the sake of others, subconscious avoidance, or just lack of prioritization. Think about these questions and be honest with yourself to truly create a targeted and intentional plan around your self care routine (for each area):

• Who can help support you and hold you accountable in reaching your goals in this area?

• What could distract you from carrying out your goals in this area?

• What are the tools you need to support you in this area?

• What is a realistic amount of time that you can put into reaching the goals you have for this area?

• How will you know you are moving toward your goals in this area?

• Are you ready to really do the work necessary to reach this goal?

5. Write it in Pen!

When I was in school, I always had difficulty remembering everything I needed to do or prioritizing certain things. I would write things in my planner with my pencil but I’d either rearrange things or just miss it somehow. At some point, I learned that writing in pen actually signals my brain to recognize the importance of something. It made a world of difference for me because it was quite literally a permanent part of my goals and my intention needed to be sound if I was going to actually write it down.

Make your self care routine real by writing it down. Whether you want to journal, type it in your phone, write it on post-its, or put it on a vision board, make sure whatever you do is significant enough that even in your daily life you are constantly reminded of your goals.

6. Lean into the Process

Honesty and intention are the foundation to consistency in anything, and self care is no exception. Putting in a consistent effort to prioritize your wellness can be difficult, but the results are worth it. Advocate for your healing, lean into the process and celebrate it for what it is, a journey. 

Thanks for getting A Little Mental with me!