Life Lessons: 5 Reasons Why Everything Hits the Fan in Your 20’s
IYKYK.
As a kid, whenever I heard an adult's age I used to think, “Wow, they’re old”. Now, I think “Wow, they really survived this long living like this.” And when I say “like this” I mean, as a full fledged card carrying member of the adult world. It’s rough out here. And here’s why.
1. Adulting is hard
Bills, insurance, doctor visits, relationships, moving, soreness, weight gain, making life decisions, your job or lack thereof…it’s a lot to deal with. Now slap a pandemic and social isolation on top of that and you got yourself a real big mess of responsibility that you may not have had before, but everyone expects you to handle. It’s a lot.
2. Life transitions and events trigger evaluation of foundational ideals
They don’t call it a quarter-life crisis for nothing! I’ve never used the term existential crises so much in my life than in the last few years. Who you thought you were may not be who you are anymore. What you thought may not be what you think. Stepping into the real world can be transformative, but the process isn’t always pretty. Your ideas around life and death, relationships, right and wrong, and every other gray area topic gets even more saturated with gray. It can make your head hurt.
3. 75% of all mental illnesses occur before the age of 24
A lot of stuff can happen by the time you reach 24 years old. Life events and situations that are considered stressful or traumatic can trigger the onset of mental illness. Genetics also play a role in this statistic. Studies have shown that disorders like major depression, autism, attention deficit hyperactivity disorder, bipolar disorder, and even schizophrenia are hereditary. And many disorders are not diagnosed until symptoms have been consistent and adverse for extended periods of time.
4. Our brains don’t fully develop until around the age of 30
My mom ran this into the ground when I was a teenager, but it’s true. Our cognitive development doesn’t taper off until our 30’s which means there are still processes that are growing and developing through our 20’s. The last part of your brain to develop is your prefrontal cortex, or your decision making area, which I’m sure can explain some behaviors we all may be starting to regret or will at some point. Clinically speaking, there are even some disorders that mental health professionals stay away from diagnosing younger people, due to the fact that growing minds go through a lot of changes in those years. But the effects of those changes can be pretty intense.
5. Post Grad Depression is real
Those first couple years out of college are pretty rough: Friends who you saw everyday are spread across the country and around the world, you have to move back in with your parents, or start paying bills to prevent moving back in with your parents, the clock on your college debt starts, you have to find accountability outside of a class schedule, you got a job that you only kinda like, if that, or you’re still looking for one, everyone looks more successful than you on social media, I could go on. Life isn’t the same, and those feelings of depression, grief, and anxiety are all valid.
Don’t get me wrong. A lot of great things can happen in this period of time. Your 20’s are a great space in time to mold your life with the best experiences and memories to last a lifetime. But, it takes some doing to get there. And it’s okay to acknowledge the fact that this is not easy. But we’ll get through it, a little at a time.
Thanks for getting A Little Mental with me!
